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A Time When My Anxiety Gets The Best Of Me

Nts don't understand how mental illness affects us. They see it as 'overreacting.' Little do they know anxiety is a chemical imbalance and affect how your brain sees things.

Anxiety is like a manipulator. Think of it this way. Like when I was in high school during gym class, I thought this girl was talking about me since I have been verbally bullied my entire freshman year. In reality, she could have been talking about a movie she saw.

Here is a case where my mom thinks I overreact. I started taking birth control for the sake of regulating my period. I feel annoyed with constantly having to do pregnancy tests. We all know BC prevents pregnancy. it also regulates your period, helps women with endo, a disorder that gives women painful periods, it helps your skin, helps your hormones. I feel all Drs look at is the people prevent pregnancy and not other benefits the pill has. I feel dirty having to do a pregnancy test for some damn BC. Argo, I think the Drs secretly think I am…
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I Am Starting A Video Editing Service

I've been unemployed for 5 years because of autism. I came across an article on Facebook about a guy who started his own business after no one would hire him. I started thinking about what if this is the reality for people with disabilities? Employers really don't wanna hire disabled people.  I thought to myself I am improving my editing skills over time and I am getting skilled with Wondershare Filmora. I edit for my YouTube channel. I have a planner I can mark on my planner when the person needs their video. I even had 2 additional editors depending on what I am dealing with Editing my own videos alone is helping me build my skills and experience.
I thought why not start a video editing service.

My rates start at 5 dollars. It will be between 5-25 dollars. It will depend on how much work your video requires. It won't be 5 dollars per minute. Let's say your videos don't require too much the total will be 5 dollars or even less. I will talk a final price with you a…

My Perfect Grandma

The title of this article may have you scratching your head. Yes, you are reading this correctly. My grandma IS perfect. We all know only God is perfect. I guess God added a player. My grandma is the perfect person. I even added her name in my phone as 'perfect person.' Making mistakes, mere accidents don't exist in my grandma's mind. The smallest thing goes wrong and it's WW3. It's like nothing I do is good enough for the perfect queen. This is why I don't want to do anything. If I do it's not good enough. I can't win with the perfect person. If I was on survivor I'd vote her off. A person who is so perfect would be a threat to me.
I would show her name if I survive tribal with no regrets.
The header image was the best I could find.

My grandma complains that no one wants to help her do anything yet she puts everyone down and starts WW3 over the smallest thing. No one wants to help someone so ungrateful. Someone tries their best to help you and …

Looking At The Big Picture

I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do as a job. I wanted to do YouTube full-time until they made it hard for smaller channels to show ads. Then I found and wanted to blog full time on there. I also told you in 2017 I went through the most useless job program ever. My impression is that they would prepare me for the job I am trying to get. In my case, I want a job involving a computer and preparing me for that. More like the program was useless with my issue with employment. My mom wanted me to work in a retail job. She thinks I can just stock shelves but that is not how retail works. She really things they are ONLY going to have me stocking? Retail tends to switch around your schedule and/or position.

It never occurred to her that a constantly changing schedule or position will overwhelm me. She claimed that the doctor told her that I need a job that doesn't have a lot of people and low stress but thinks RETAIL is low stress and doesn't have many people.  A…

I Have Until March To Become A Part-time Blogger

I have explained that I am starting to bring in money from my crypto blogs (ex The site is like Reddit but you earn rewards for your content which you can convert to cryptocurrency (like Bitcoin) I decided to work from home last year after doing some thinking. I felt working from home would be best. I can set my own schedule, be on my time, go at my own pace. It would fit me perfectly vs being on someone else's time and schedule and having to work at a fast pace. I do tell people about Steemit when they ask me about my job. This could be my calling, promoting unknown technology.

I have my disability hearing in January. I told my doc about it. He asked me if I tried finding a job. I called the lawyers and they asked the same thing. I have a feeling they may put me through a program and I CANNOT do programs due to the stress and pressure the last program I went through put me under. You can read more about that here.
While at the docs, he mentions that a patient of his…

My Grandma Verbally Abuses Me (trigger warning)

I mention abuse in this blog and may mention some sensitive stuff, please read with caution. You don't have to read if you don't want to. If you choose to read, just be careful, alright? Anyways I hope someone learns something from this.

My grandma verbally abuses me on a regular basis. I am not trying to invalid physical abuse. Any type of abuse is messed up. Bones heal but healing a broken mind isn't so simple. My grandma likes to treat people like dirt and wonder why no one wants to do anything for her.
 My grandpa treated her badly. If she doesn't like it when he does it to her then what makes her think I want to be treated that way? I feel like my grandma is angry at me for no reason. I've done nothing wrong. I am fed up with being treated like this because I don't do things how she wants me to and when she wants me to. I am fed up with me wanting me to do things like she wants it done. This is why I wouldn't be able to hold down a job.

My mom is suppo…

Introducing My First Campagine For A New Phone

Remember my failed attempt to save up money for my recent trip down south? I did blog every day in September to fund the trip. I post my content to The site has an extension called Dlike where you can post links. I am doing a second attempt at this but with proper planning.

Every 2 or 3 years I upgrade my phone. I just wanna buy my own phone this time. My mom has been buying my things due to my inability to find a job.  For things I want like a phone or a tablet, I will do a little campaign where I add an extra day posting to my blog and Verond. I will be starting my new YouTube next Monday so I won't have older videos to share. This way I have a link to share every day.

For this I need to save up 300 dollars. I probably can get a good phone for 200 but I am also going to need some money to buy a phone case and a screen cover since I am clumsy and I drop my phone a lot.

I will have a video version later on.

This will run until I reach my goal. On my Weku blog, Whalesh…