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Things I Wish I Would Have Known

There are some things that I wish I would have known as an adult with autism. There are some things we don't know. How do you expect someone to know if you don't tell the person? I will explain some things I wish someone would have told me.

Fidget Spinner, Various Fidget Spinner, Spinner, Toys

I admit I was not ready for the 'adult' world. Having to adult in a world that makes no sense is hard enough. It is tough being in a world for NTs.

I Wish I Would Have Known My Folks Would Start Depending On Me

I never expected my folks to start depending on me. I was not prepared. Remember folks with autism need a heads up. They need time to adjust, time to respond, etc. I noticed my folks started relying on me to cook, my grandpa depends on me to drive him around.  I can barely understand the world around me, I wouldn't be able to fend for myself if my folks died tomorrow, and they expect so much from me. I need to be able to handle myself before I can handle someone else.  If my folks died tomorrow, God forbid, I would be homeless. Not able to find a job that I can cope with. Even if I could, no one would hire me due to the last things I did being 7 years ago. Many other factors. I have my crypto blogs but I am not at the stage to make a full-time living. Why should 3 people count on me and I can't even catch myself if I fall?

I Wish I Would Have Known That My Requests Would be Denied

Having my requests denied is the sole reason why it's so hard for me. I got a letter from the food stamp office. It said I needed to come in for an interview. The letter was not clear on what the interview was about so I assumed it was to follow up. Every year the people follow up to see if your income changes. I get there. I get called back. I asked the lady if someone can come with me in case something I don't understand is said and the lady denied it because I am an adult. When the work requirements came out of knowhere something so unexpected overwhelmed me with anxiety with no time to process. They were trying to get me in the program immediately. I had no prior warning about this, no time to process, no time to adjust, no time to understand. When I got the letter they had me in for cash benefits somehow. That's what the lady said. Maybe if they didn't make that mistake, I would have known about this sudden change. If that lady didn't deny my request, my mom could have spoken on my behalf. She could have explained that I have anxiety and she speaks for me in the event that I can't. Maybe the case manager would have had some mercy if my mom was there to help explain the situation. She was going to FORCE me to work if I couldn't get my papers signed. Maybe she wouldn't have been so harsh had that other lady not deny my request and let my mom come with me. I am just guessing. I really don't know.

I wish that I would have known that the world will be hard for me.

I Wish I Would Have Known NTs Are Judgemental

People can be judgemental. I told a 'friend' that I couldn't work and she judged and shamed me and held me on the same standards as her friends. Everyone has different circumstances. What worked for her friends may not have worked for me. She assumed my skills are 'poor.' Most people have good skills but can't find a job within them.

I don't mean all NTs just some.

I just wish people would stop holding me on the same standards. I am not that person. I am myself.

I wish I would have understood that my mom would start playing games. For starters, she claimed my old doctor said I have to find a job where I am not around a lot of people then hollers 'work at Walmart' when she knows how busy it gets. My mom sided with my doctor until I couldn't see him anymore due to an error and that dumb counselor invalidated my autism.

There are a lot of things I wish. I also wish I would have known that my mom would throw me into things I have never done before. Back when I needed dental surgery, I needed to pick an insurance plan. Let me pause, I have NEVER done anything like that before. My mom didn't want to help me 'because I am an adult and this is something I need to do.' How do you expect me to know how to do something if I HAVE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE AND DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?! As a result, I picked a plan that wouldn't cover the care that I needed. I am not saying you have to shelter us, I am saying you can't just throw something at us that we have never done before and expected us to know how to do it. Another reason why schools need to get rid of that useless stuff and teach kids things they will need. My high school had these classes but not all students will have the room on their schedule. I think these classes should be graduation requirements and math, science can be for fun.

I have bet that even some NTs struggle to adult from not being taught the things they will need.


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~Image is from

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